Written By Alan Good
Do you recall the song, “Don’t worry, be happy”? You have put off seeing the doctor about some malady yet worry about what it could be. Or you have made the appointment and are soon to have treatment. Perhaps you feel life has been keeping you down. You ask, “Why is this happening to me?”
Kids don’t visit (as often as we’d like), we get pain in strange places, friends get sick, or worse, die. As a senior, if you haven’t noticed after all these years, life has its fill of challenges. Some might label them “trouble”, “problems”, “obstacles”, “issues”, or by some other name. `
When we label these times, we’re saying life is unfair. We draw attention to them. We focus on the situation and that just seems to exacerbate the matter. For example, when we stub a toe or hit a thumb with a hammer, get a paper cut, the spot in question throbs as we pay attention to it. Trying to alleviate the pain rarely works. But soon after something else draws our attention away from the wound and we realize it doesn’t hurt—until we put our mind on it again!
Now I am not minimalizing your grief, your pain. However, focusing on our challenges draws too much attention to them. I’m speaking as a two-time cancer survivor who is headed in for surgery again, this time for kidney cancer.
What I have learned in all this is to stop thinking (worrying) about what may—or may not—be ahead and refocus my thoughts. This can be done for any malady or challenge you face. Non-resistance is something that this writer has come across many times. When we resist something, we can feel worse. We are fighting the issue, challenge, or pain.
What is resistance? Anger. Resentment. Disappointment. It is basically refusing to accept what happens and wanting things to change. It is wanting to “get through” something to get to something else. It is worry and anxiety. When are minds are full—when we are mindful—of the problem at hand, we can see nothing else. We can’t see solutions.
James Allen calls this a “rankling mind”. A mind spinning and churning. At the risk of repeating a theme, meditation is a key resolve here. Quieting our minds by deep breathing and focussing on those breaths can quiet your mind and your body. We are told several times in the Bible to, “Be still…”
Refocusing on now, thinking about what you have, being grateful, will take you though the dark valley. You will want to race through it, but don’t. Take it as it comes. Accept what is. You will be doing yourself a favour.
Your affirmation should be, “I will not borrow the anxieties and distresses of tomorrow, to aggravate those of the present day, nor let the unknown and unknowable move me”.
