Written By Alan Good
I’m a passionate guy. After many years of marriage, my fervour has not waned. Just ask my wife. Years of changes and upheavals have perhaps increased my passionate nature.
As stated, ask my wife how passionate I am. Travel with me and let someone cut me off, you’ll hear that passion. No, I’m not someone who will get out of my car and yell or threaten anyone. But I will internalize the event, keep replaying the “insult” over and over again.
As seniors, we may get passionate about our grown children, their families—our grandchildren—or our partner. Our passion can be expressed when we are perhaps treated poorly, or we think we are being forgotten. It may seem like a little thing but as well as hurting others, our passionate remarks hurt ourselves.
I used to think yelling was a way of relieving stress when something, or someone, crossed me. Since, I have read about the effects of passion in its many forms—anger, hatred, disappointment.
Yes, even sitting alone in my disappointment can cause pain. Doctors and scientists, those who have studied the effects of negative thoughts, agree that disease and other ailments arise from our negativity. Even the word “dis-ease” has the connotation of harm to us.
One definition of passion is, showing or caused by strong feelings or a strong belief. There’s a lot going on in that description!
For one, feelings. When another has done something we don’t like, something we think is an insult or an affront toward us, our feelings about that may cause us to react negatively, if only within. We “believe” we have been misused or insulted, perhaps.
Cancer, arthritis, and ulcers have been attributed to negative attitudes. Anxiety, fear, worry, all can cause us to be sick. Perhaps that’s one reason why the Bible exhorts us to think about things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy.
On the other hand, strong positive passion about our work, family, or volunteer activities, can give us strength. Positive passion provides us with the energy to go toward our dreams. It is the motivation or desire to do something—a psychological force to succeed. It helps us to bear the pain of doing something difficult. It is a guide to maintaining goal-oriented behavior.
All it takes is taking control of our minds. Turn our thoughts from inward, personal hurts, to outward other thoughts. When we think about others in an optimistic light we are focusing toward them, and away from ourselves. This goes back to being mindful, as discussed in other articles. Training our mind daily, hourly, then every minute, to see others first, will change them more than any negative or destructive act or statement from us ever will.
Next time you feel or believe you have been slighted or overlooked, focus on breathing and then believe you are enough. Also, thoughts of love and compassion will go a long way in changing our reactions to what others may say or do.
