Written By Alan Good
We have looked at asking the right questions and possibly having someone with you during medical appointments. After all, getting right answers could mean the difference between living well and unwelcome surprises.
According to Doctors Samantha Winemaker and Hsien Seow in their book, “Hope for the best, Plan for the rest”, rather than focussing on the illness or how it’s affecting us, we should get the big picture. By that, they mean understanding the overall storyline of the illness and where we are within it.
Because medical professionals sometimes want to give hope or be cheerful and optimistic, they may provide vague answers. This can leave patients and families assuming incorrectly that the future is unknown.
The term “zooming out” is used extensively in the book and suggests patients and their support look at illness trajectories. Most illnesses are somewhat predictable in their timeline and can be charted. Drawing an illness trajectory better provides one with possible changes as time passes as well as possible outcomes and treatments.
According to the docs, “Every life-changing illness has a natural history or illness trajectory to it”. Information through this method can give you a birds-eye view of what to expect along the journey. Unfortunately, most health care providers are not trained to talk about the big picture of illness.
Mapping out the stages of a particular disease may help differentiate the storyline from the timeline. Sometimes patients, and even doctors, can “get into the weeds” and need to back out, or zoom out, to “really understand what should be governing these decisions”.
The book goes on to state we should know ourselves. Knowing our tendencies and personality when faced with any challenges can help with finding answers you want. This goes for the person or people assisting you.
What is your style? Are you the type who wants all the information at once, or do you need time to process each update you just received? Are you able to take charge and ask questions, or are you comfortable with a trusted friend or family member asking?
The book offers ways to assess your inner style as well and that of your “crew members”, or support group. Time taken before you receive news of a life-changing illness can be gold. As in most things, preparedness is key. You are well now, and that’s great! But a few questions about who you are and how you deal with issues will go a long way to helping you if, God forbid, you receive news that things have changed in your body.
In my case, having my wife, Pam, and adult kids, wanting answers was both informative and comforting. Knowing others were looking at my cancer from different angles—one daughter did lots of research—I could concentrate on just living. The challenge was there, yes, but between all of us everything was being done and on time. I didn’t have to wonder if I was too late and the cancer had spread.
Less stress at those times is also key to a quicker healing. In the words of Socrates, “Know thyself”.
